Thoughts on Hospitality

Him: Is it okay if I invite them over?
Me: How long will it be until you get here?
Him: Maybe twenty minutes.
Me: {sigh} I’ll hurry up and see what I can do.

I remember the days of having that kind of conversation. I remember the stress. My sweet husband would want to invite friends or youth group kids (when we were doing youth ministry) over. It stressed.me.out.

Confession: There were times when I would discourage him from inviting people over. I didn’t want to invest the time in cleaning the house and preparing snacks. Selfish but true!

Our house has never been super-tidy all the time. We’re not dirtballs (most of the time), but we do have our share of clutter. Having spur-of-the-moment company used to flip me into anxiety mode.

Fast-forward to last weekend. I noticed that a friend of my husband’s was unusually quiet at our Saturday night church service. Emma and I came home, but my husband was still at the church. I called him and I told him what I noticed. I told him that he was welcome to invite this friend over if he needed to chat.

Yep. Me. I initiated it.

Oh and did I mention that our Christmas decorations were still in tubs in the living room at the time? (Yes, I’ve put them away since then.) Did I mention that I didn’t have and arsenal of homemade snacks at the ready?

So what changed my tune?

Learning the difference between hospitality and entertaining.

Entertaining

Entertaining is stressful. Entertaining means being the hostess and making sure that guests are having a good time. It means bringing out the finest and amusing the people who visit your home. It means a spotless home and well-planned refreshments. It means being ON while people are in your home.

Blech.

I’m not an entertainer. I don’t want put on a show. Yet had been my mindset for years.

Hospitality

Hospitality is opening the door of your home and welcoming people into it. It means allowing them into your space, into your life. It draws them in to be part of your family while they’re visiting. Hospitality is warm and friendly.

Viewing guests through the lens of hospitality means that Christmas totes in the middle of January don’t matter. It means that popping up some popcorn (which is the snack our family would’ve had anyways) works for refreshments. It’s not elaborate. It’s just comfortable and welcoming. It says, “Hey, kick your shoes off, put your feet up, and make yourself at home.”

Does that mean that we can’t go all out to serve up a great meal? Of course not! What we serve and how we decorate don’t make the difference between hospitality and entertaining. It’s all about the heart and how we view our guests. What’s our goal? If we’re out to WOW them, we’re probably entertaining. If we’re out to meet their needs and make them feel welcome and loved, we’re being hospitable.

“Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.”
~ Romans 12:13 

We’re not asked to entertain them. We’re asked to welcome them in and meet their needs. Those needs might be physical, emotional, or spiritual.

“Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.”
~ I Peter 4:9 

Viewing visitors through that hospitality lens will cure the grumbling.

The next time you have an opportunity to welcome someone into your home, I challenge you to practice hospitality. Don’t put on a show. Just open the door and your heart as you invite someone to c’mon in and be part of your family for a while.

I’m sharing this post at:
:: Works for Me Wednesday hosted by We Are THAT Family
:: Finer Things Friday hosted by The Finer Things in Life

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